Loughtagalla Times

“Jon was a great man to start a session, and every night was memorable.”

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THIS WEEK’S GUEST on Face The Music is Pat Shortt — actor, comedian, TV host, and more importantly, a Thurles man.

My first encounter with Pat was not exactly a jolly one. This was back in our school days in the Tech, when he confronted myself and a friend of mine (Declan Kiely, wherever you are) for flinging “missiles” at one of his relatives. I won’t go into that now but it involved a minibus, a bicycle, and a couple of stale ham sandwiches that somehow managed to become airborne. When I interviewed Pat years later, he had no recollection of the event, so I’m not even going to mention it…

Ah Pat, there you are! I was just telling the lads we had great times together back in school. Those were the days, eh? Anyway, you’re very welcome, and thanks for taking the time to chat to us.

Obviously you grew up in Thurles among the Chosen People. Do you have a particularly fond memory of the town, or of your childhood here?

PAT: I have to say I have great memories of growing up in Thurles particularly the Munster finals. When I was very young, we always found bicycles that were left behind by fellas who obviously had a few jars too many and got a lift home. They never came back for the bikes and all the young fellas on our street had old High Nellies!
 
Who has been the biggest influence in your life?

I would have to say my Dad. He was a great musician and a bit of a character. He was always having a laugh, which obviously stuck with me.
 
As someone who, ahem, went to the Tech around the same time as yourself, I have to ask if you’ve ever run into those old teachers over the years, and if they recognise themselves in a certain sketch of yours?

Ahhh ha ha! It’s funny, that teacher character was influenced by some of the teachers I met in all the schools that I went to, but it was never one in particular. It was an amalgamation of them all. They are a particular breed, and are very funny.
 
You started as a saxophone player, and you played the sax alongside Jon Kenny in the very early comedy years. Could you be coaxed on stage to jam with a few of the lads below in Hickey’s?

Absolutely, I could even teach them the showband swagger.
 
It’s long overdue a revival, in fairness. What’s your best memory of Jon?

There are too many to narrow down to one. But wherever you went with him would end up in singing and craic. He was a great man to start a session, and every night was memorable. I must say I miss the music and craic sessions.
 
Best music or comedy gig you’ve ever been to?

You cant beat the great sessions in The Monk’s in Thurles, they have just been getting better and better over the years.

As a comedian, what’s the best venue you’ve played?

I have great memories of Andrews Lane in Dublin and the Tivoli theatre. Both have been knocked and are gone. I suppose I remember them fondly because it was where D’unbelievables started out.
 
Do you have any advice for someone who might be thinking of getting into comedy?

Just get out to an open mic club and get up and start. Always remember –if it makes you laugh, its funny.
 
When you meet strangers on the street, what sketch do they quote most often?

The sweet shop sketch from D’Telly video of D’ubelievables.
 
Do you have a favourite sketch of your own?

I love the sweet shop one, but I also love anything by the Guard that I do live.
 
It’s going on 20 years now since we met Dan and the boys in Jacksie’s. Are there any plans to go back to Killinaskully?

No. Unfortunately RTE have no budgets like that anymore.
 
Where’s your favourite spot for a pint?

I have to say Mother Mac’s In Limerick. One of the best craft beer and whiskey pubs in Ireland.
 
What comedy legend would you most like to have a drink with, and why?

Dylan Moran is one of my favourite Irish comedians. I was lucky to do a film with Dylan a few years back called Breakfast Wine, and went for a few pints with him then. He is very funny.
 
Which of your films are you most proud of?

I have to say Garage. It changed my film career.
 
Speaking of films, I have a script about a cross-dressing serial killer from Two-Mile Borris who targets middle-aged men on electric bicycles, and whose murder weapon of choice is a large sod of turf. Are you interested?

I think if it was set in Littleton it would be more believable. Then I would be interested. 

Sorry, I’m barred from the village of Littleton because of a certain article about culchies. But we’ll work something out. What’s the last book you read?

Murder at Lordship. I love true crime novels.
 
It’s Sunday morning – what are you doing?

Most likely watching Moto GP on the telly. I love motorbikes.

And what kind of bikes do you have yourself?

I have a Vespa PX 200 to run around town. I have a Harley Road King 2003 Anniversary edition for international touring. I have a Kawasaki KH 125 because it’s beautiful, and a vintage James Cadet 150 that’s under restoration and should be ready next month.

The old High Nellies obviously gave you a taste for fine bikes! You wake up tomorrow and you’re Supreme Leader of Ireland. What’s the first thing you do?

Open a comedy club in every small village in Ireland.
 
Your daughter Faye has followed you into the world of comedy, and you’re both about to embark on another nationwide tour. What has it been like working together?

When we are not killing each other, its great craic!

Is it time for Crimebusters to make a return, with Fays as a Bean Garda?

Listen to you! There’s no such thing as a Bean Garda! They are only Gardai now. There was a time when you could say that but not any more, ha ha! Not a bad Idea though…

Remember where you got that idea, Pat. Have your people call my people. But anyway, I suppose the important question is this: When the tour starts, will Faye be driving the big van?

You couldn’t stop her. She’s driving the forklift in the warehouse too. She was reared on diesel!
 
What can audiences expect from the new show, Shortt Stuff?

The same madness that we usually get up to. Lots of new characters and mayhem.

Shortt Stuff comes to Bru Boru, Cashel, on Saturday 1st November, and The Source, Thurles, on Saturday 17th January.

WATCH: Crimebusters, with Pat Shortt and Jon Kenny.